I see what you mean, Come to think about it, there's tons of books out there about obsession. Lord of the Rings and Gone With the Wind come immediately to mind, as well as Moby Dick like you mentioned.

When the object of obsession is a child -- rather than a ring, a lost cause, or a whale -- it's hard to see the forest for the trees, especially if the reader is a survivor of child abuse. True, the actual sex is between the lines and in the reader's mind, and that makes it all the nastier. Reading it feels like inviting the set of a child porn film into one's own bedroom, and taking a turn in the director's chair.

For that matter, many romance novels portray obsession as the driving force of the narrative, but usually the characters in these are all adults. Or else, all protagonists are teens, as in Young Adult Fiction.

So I'll take a pass on re-reading Lolita. I'm a survivor and don't want to nasty up my mind any further. But I've read Moby Dick and Lord of the Rings a few times and I get what you're saying.