Finding Missing Pieces of Myself: Late-Identified Autism Interview (Long version)
·
Follow
26 min read
·
Draft
This is the 44th interview in my series Interviewing Late-Identified Autistics. Justin Olhipi is a late-identified autistic. My questions are in bold and Justin’s responses follow in regular typeface.
Collage by Justin Olhipi using images from Creative Commons
What name do you use and, if you want to share it, what pronouns do you use?
I go by Justin Olhipi on Medium so let’s use that. My pronouns are they/them.
How old were you when you learned you were autistic?
55
How did you learn you are autistic?
First, let me express my deepest gratitude for this very rare opportunity to be seen and heard.
I began to realize that I am autistic when I happened upon an article in Wired magazine about face blindness. I realized that I’ve had this condition all my life and it has caused me great difficulty with jobs and social situations. I found out that face blindness is common among autistic people. Then I read about how autism presents in females and the description fit me to a T. I found some peer-reviewed medical journal articles describing how autism presents in females, printed these out, and made an appointment at a county mental health clinic. This led to my diagnosis of Asperger’s syndrome (shortly before this diagnosis was removed from the DSM).
I still self-disclose Asperger’s when warranted because most people have an idea what Asperger’s means.
If I say I am autistic, people say stuff like, “but you’re not like my neighbor’s son who needs diapers and bangs his head on the floor.” I don’t have the spoons to educate everyone, so I use the word that they understand.
How did you decide whether to self-identify or diagnose?
Initially, I self-identified but then got a diagnosis. This qualified me for accommodations under the ADA and I was then able to return to college and hold a job. I was never able to hold a job before because I was often fired for my autistic traits.
How did you feel when you learned you were autistic?
It was like finding missing pieces of myself. At last, my life made sense.
How do any of your identities (ex. gender, race, religion, sexuality, etc.) impact your late identification as autistic?
I am a mystic. I was raised Catholic and am now a
Red Letter Pantheist.
As I see it, religions were developed at the dawn of the agricultural age to deal with the problems that came with many non-related people living in proximity. Prior to that, we didn’t think of “religion” as a distinct realm of life; instead, we practiced various forms of animism that developed naturally from various environments.
A religion is “good” or “true” insofar as it solves the problems of agriculturalism in ways that are best for everyone. A religion is “bad” or “false” insofar as it reinforces ignorance, greed, and wrath in the name of tribalism, which is seen as the greatest virtue.
The entire universe is God’s body, and God is a conscious force field that pervades the universe.
In my experience, the entire universe is God’s body, and God is a conscious force field that pervades the universe. Within the constraints of time, God is not omniscient. Instead, God is constantly learning through Its experiences throughout the universe.
I remember many of my past lives. In most of these I was male and I was not white. To my understanding, we each decide on a purpose in our lives before we incarnate, and choose the circumstances of birth that will support this purpose. Unfortunately, most people forget their purpose during the trauma of birth.
I’m lucky because I know that I’ve come into this life to learn, practice, and teach the virtues of Truth and Compassion.
In the metaphysical realm, Truth is any mental construct which leads to virtuous action.
I believe I was born in a female body because compassion is the highest virtue and it comes more naturally to females due to female hormones. I believe I was born into difficult circumstances because the experience of suffering can lead to compassion. I believe I was born autistic so that I could see past social expectations and conventions to understand Truth and Compassion as universal constructs, beyond tribal limitations.
By tribal limitations, I mean prioritizing one’s own group over all others and the values which enforce group cohesion over universal values.
I came into this life with an aptitude for math because math enables humans to make mental models of phenomena that are homeomorphic to the phenomena, That is, operations performed on these models accurately reflect homologous operations performed on the phenomena.
Math is the language of science. There are other ways to make mental models — art, words, etc. — but these models are metaphors at best. They don’t enjoy the same homeomorphism to phenomena as mathematical models do. Thus, math is a useful tool for making true sense of the material world.
Truth is that which repeatedly stands up to evidence.
Some people ask, what is Truth, as if that were some mystery. It’s simple: Truth in the realm of phenomena is that which repeatedly stands up to evidence (especially, attempts to disprove). Math is used to make sense of this evidence. Moreover, math can be used to create beautiful mental constructs that don’t necessarily correspond to phenomena. This is why math is an art as well as a science.
I also came into this life with an aptitude for music so that I would have a means of expression and finding joy, and I came in faceblind so that I could treat everyone well, without distinctions. If someone mistreats me, I don’t usually remember their face, so I can more easily forgive them.
My race is problematic. I look like a white person of Mediterranean heritage, and my family thinks we’re white. My birth certificate even says so. However, my family has been in New Orleans for hundreds of years, and a DNA test confirmed what I’ve always suspected. We have ancestors from all over the world. These are probably the offspring of sailors. When I interact with people of color, sooner or later they often ask if I’m “mixed.’ I say that I am, and thank them for noticing.
Like many people in my family, I am a natural medium, in contact with ancestral spirits. By ancestral spirits I mean people who have passed on, whether I’m related to them by blood or not. I am aware of these ancestors and feel their inspiration in my daily life. They instruct me in various arts and sciences, and spur me to struggle for justice for all peoples. I feel a little shock when I look in the mirror and see a white woman (I’m not supposed to look like that!) But I know that
I came in a white body so that I could have access to certain resources that I would not have otherwise had, and so that I can practice the principle: with power comes responsibility.
Like many autistic people, I feel “off” in the gender assigned to me at birth and identify as non-binary. Ever since puberty, I’ve had a deeper voice and some facial hair, and these have become more prominent since menopause. I do not attempt to modify these, instead, I let them be, to honor my male side. Sometimes people address me as if I were male and this makes me very happy. However, hormones or surgery would not be right for me. My body is healthy and works properly and if I were to modify it, it might not continue to do so. Mastectomy can damage underlying tendons, lymph nodes, and muscles, and testosterone increases the risk of heart disease and other ailments.
At a center for gender nonconforming folks, I saw trans-men sitting in a circle talking about horrible crimes they’d witnessed or heard or read about, and laughing like they were swapping jokes. One of them topped all the others by telling of things he’d actually done — or at least, claimed to have done.
I’ve often seen cis men talking the same way. When I saw trans men doing this I realized that taking pleasure in others’ suffering is probably an effect of testosterone. I can see where this would have been an evolutionary advantage in the past, but with the world getting smaller, we need universal compassion if we are to survive. So no T for me!
How did your friends and family respond when you told them you are autistic?
Some people in my family believe it and some do not.
One of my sisters said, “Now it all makes sense,”
One of my brothers said, “Stop playing the victim! You could do better if you quit making excuses and tried harder! I’ve had a hard time too — if I can make it, anyone can!” No.
If he can make it, that means he can make it. But that doesn’t say anything about anyone else.
He does not represent all of humanity — we each have our own unique set of talents and limitations. As a firstborn male, he received all sorts of advantages and opportunities that his siblings didn’t.
People tell me I can’t be autistic because I’m not like their coworker’s nephew or whatever. They tell me that I just need to try harder and quit being so self-centered. My neighbor, bless her heart, said this when I disclosed that I’m autistic: “You’re not autistic! Don’t let any haters tell you that! I’m a home health caregiver and I take care of autistic people. I have to spoon-feed them and change their diapers even though they’re grown! Stop calling yourself bad names, you’re very smart and you’re a Child of God!’ She meant well but her statements reeked of ignorance and ableism. I let it slide because I couldn’t get a word in edgewise.
She could not see or hear me because she was too busy telling me that I’m not autistic. That’s why I’d rather say that I’m an Aspie.
Did you seek out therapy, coaching, or other forms of structured support for autism?
I would like to have support but it does not seem to be available in the USA for level-1 adults who are not wealthy.
How has learning you are autistic impacted your life?
I finally know who and what I am.
Your Current Life
How have you modified or adapted your life since learning you’re autistic?
I know that my needs are legitimate.
If I need to rest after being out in public, I’m not lazy, I’m just overloaded. If I have trouble with conversations, it’s not because I don’t care or I’m not listening hard enough, it’s because I have CAPD (central auditory processing disorder) and I have trouble making words when under stress.
If I have trouble recognizing people, it’s not because I don’t care, it’s because I’m face blind. If I behave oddly, it’s not because I’m seeking attention or trying to annoy people, it’s because I don’t understand social rules intuitively like most people do. If I get upset when interrupted at something I’m interested in and have a hard time getting back to it, it’s not because I’m stubborn or self-absorbed, it’s because I get engrossed.
If I’m concerned about matters of social justice, it’s not because I’m virtue signaling or because I want to rule the world, it’s because I know what it’s like to be mistreated because you’re different and don’t belong.
So I allow myself to be me instead of what other people think I should be. I wear earplugs, avoid places where there’s a lot of noise or crowds or flashing lights, carry a notepad to communicate when I can’t talk, rest when I need to, and don’t get down on myself for being different.
In what ways does being autistic enhance your life?
When I am doing something that makes me lose track of time, I feel good.
I am a mystic, which gives my life richness and meaning.
I enjoy my special interests. Math music writing and social justice are long-term, and other transient interests such as medicinal herbs, crafts, world religions, crystals, tarot, a few others. I allow myself time and space to engage in these. I no longer worry about being like everyone else and buying everything on TV to keep up with the Joneses.
I think in math, pictures, and music.
I was surprised to find out that most people think in words. Words are very inefficient. The only time I think in words is when I’m writing, talking, or planning a conversation. Also, I’ve noticed while talking with a therapist that when I think in words, my thoughts often turn negative. I’d rather share art or music during a therapy session. Talking about my problems just makes me feel bad.
Most of my problems cannot be solved, they can only be accepted.
What are some of the challenges you face in being autistic?
I’ve always been taught to prioritize other’s wants and needs.
I feel like a visitor from another planet. Long before I knew what masking was, I called it ‘passing for human.’ I feel like I’m some related species, not really human.
Before diagnosis, I was often fired for being autistic. Now that I have a diagnosis I can keep a job under ADA protections. At best, I am appreciated for my talents rather than fired for being different. It’s still tough, though.
My relatively low support needs allow people to dismiss my needs even when I state them clearly.
I’ve seen people with more obvious needs treated with far more kindness and respect, while people just tell me to try harder to be like everyone else.
Examples:
I cannot drive because of dyspraxia, and the bus service in my city is substandard. It is very hard for me to be out for a long time among neurotypicals. The county has a door to door on call transport service for those with mobility impairments. I’ve inquired about this and was told that I am physically able to use the bus so I don’t qualify for this service. I had to turn down a good job offer because it was on the other side of town and it would have taken me two hours each way to get there by bus.
In the church I grew up in, I was marginalized for being “eccentric.” However, there was a young man who was severely impaired, and he would lie on the floor alongside the altar and moan throughout the services. No one bothered him because they said he was a special child of God.
When I was a child in school, students with obvious disabilities received extra help. No one cared that I was understimulated / bored and marginalized / bullied. When I tried to self-advocate I was told that I need to be humble because I’m smart enough to make it anyhow, while other students’ needs were more visible and thus considered more genuine. I was constantly told, be quiet and let the other kids have a chance.
At work, a new supervisor’s management style was causing me such difficulty that I became ill. I asked for a transfer to a different site but was told that this is not a reasonable accommodation. Why do they get to say what’s a reasonable accommodation for me? They’re not in my skin.
Now I’m learning to accept my lot. Most of my problems cannot be solved, only accepted.
Having compassion for everyone else is easy. Having compassion for myself is a lot harder and I’m only recently learning to do so. Prior to diagnosis, I had no self-compassion and did not see any need for it. Catholicism does not recognize self-compassion as a virtue but instead deems this to be selfishness. Humility and self-denial are seen as far more important virtues. Some Catholics even practice self harm as a form of prayer. I did, as a child, and so did many people I knew. They call it “penance.”
I was raised on stories of the saints and now realize that many of the saints were probably autistic.
In what ways have you noticed you’re different from neurotypical people (behavior, preferences, communication styles, etc.)?
Behavior: I am very careful when around neurotypicals, so I appear stiff and formal. Healthcare professionals have described my affect as flat and my speech as affected.
I’m very conscious of the ramifications of my behavior, where it comes from, and what impact it has. So I avoid lying, gossiping, littering, shaming those less fortunate, touching or taking things that don’t belong to me, etc.
Since I never learned to drive, there are all sorts of things I’d like to do but can’t because I have no way of getting there and back. I’ve learned to accept this because it helps me to sympathize with other disadvantaged people. Also, too many people driving leads to pollution, urban sprawl, classism, chauvinism, and health conditions such as obesity, diabetes, and heart disease from lack of exercise, and the exploitation of third world nations and indigenous peoples for their oil, creating accidents that maim and kill people, etc.
I know that my dyspraxia, slow reaction time, and hyperfocus could cause an accident. I’d rather be inconvenienced than have blood on my hands.
Preferences: I dress for comfort. I wear only certain fabrics and textures. I don’t wear pink because this is a symbol applied from infancy to tell everyone, “This is a female. She can never be as strong or as smart as males are. She has no other goals or purpose than to serve male convenience. Treat her accordingly. Never let her forget her place.”
I am non-binary and chafe under societal expectations of females.Why do I have to do these things when men don’t? I don’t wear makeup because it feels nasty. I don’t wear skirts because I feel exposed. My head is very sensitive so I usually cover it with a hat or scarf in public. I never learned to walk in heels. I don’t pluck my eyebrows, shave my underarms or legs, or remove the hair on my chin because it hurts to do these things.
Maybe all this creates an uncanny valley effect and that’s why people don’t see or hear me.
I love music but can’t listen to it while doing anything else, it takes up my whole attention. I have a hard time in public places where they’re playing music, such as a club or a grocery store.
I was raised a very strict Catholic, and abused in bizarre ways in the name of God. Now I avoid all organized religion because it leads to OCD-like thoughts and behaviors.
When anyone asks my religion, I say I’m a Red-Letter Pantheist.
Communication Style: I have a hard time during conversations because I never know when it’s my turn to talk, so I mostly listen. When someone is speaking, I listen intently, because I’d like for people to listen to me that way and also because with CAPD, listening requires a lot of mental and emotional labor. I listen to anyone who seems to need a listener, even and especially if they are marginalized or outcast.
In general, I treat others like I’d like to be treated. I appreciate being heard so I listen to others.
I wait my turn to talk. Often my turn never comes. When I do get a turn, someone interrupts, so I become quiet. I figure what they have to say must be more important than what I have to say, otherwise, they wouldn’t be so rude.
Or maybe I just said something inappropriate. Or maybe I’m just boring. Or maybe my voice is annoying. So I pass the mic and listen.
I carry a notepad because sometimes I can’t talk. I’ve also resorted to gestures or even full-on pantomime. Now that I know I’m autistic, I’m no longer ashamed of these things.
I’d rather read text than watch a video. Videos go too slow and I struggle to understand the spoken word, so I turn on the captions, but then I can’t see what’s going on.
I don’t like talking on the phone because it’s very difficult. I’d rather use text messaging or email. I appreciate it when people understand this and don’t hold it against me.
Do you experience any other mental or physical differences (including disabilities, other neuro diversities, etc.) that impact you? How have these influenced your autistic journey?
Dyspraxia I have dyspraxia, a common comorbidity with autism. As a child, I was often bullied and was always last chosen on teams. I was marginalized in PE class, not allowed to participate in team sports or group dances.
I’ve never been able to pass the driving test so there are a lot of things I can’t do because I have no way to get there and back.
I wish the USA had good public transportation as they have in Europe and some parts of Asia. Even in some developing countries, it’s customary for someone lucky enough to own a car to share rides with friends and neighbors or even to pick up hitchhikers.
PTSD I was diagnosed with PTSD at age 45 as a result of domestic abuse, misguided parenting, and bullying by peers and those in authority over me. This was shortly after the mental health profession began to realize that PTSD can occur in civilians as well as combat vets, and that it is often caused by adverse childhood events. Knowing this helped me to understand and have compassion for myself.
Faceblind and CAPD As mentioned earlier, I am faceblind and have CAPD. These are also common comorbidities with autism.
Being faceblind allows me to treat all people equally, no matter where they stand in the social hierarchy.
As a child, and even now, it enabled me to forgive my bullies because I couldn’t recognize them from one incident to another.
CAPD means that I must listen to people with undivided attention.
This is a blessing to them, especially if they are in a marginalized position. Most people never have anyone listen to them with undivided attention unless they’re in a powerful position. It feels good to be seen and heard and I can do this for them.
If you work, what do you do for work? How does your autistic identity impact your work?
I work part-time as a math tutor for the Learning Center at my local community college.
I have a knack for getting into a student’s head and explaining the concepts in terms that they can understand. I call it ”my Aspie mind-meld.”
It’s kind of like how Temple Grandin understands animals. I discovered this talent in high school. Although I was an outcast most of the time, I was very popular as a peer tutor when exam times came around. I used to think that everyone who is good at math could do this. I didn’t find out until grad school that this is an unusual talent.
Now that I know I’m autistic, I can ask for accommodations and sometimes even receive them.
My coworkers and supervisors appreciate my talents and overlook my gaffes and eccentricities because I disclose that I am autistic. Before I knew I am autistic, I just got fired a lot.
Is there anyone else in your family who is neurodiverse, autistic, or otherwise?
I suspect my father was autistic. He was an only child, raised under the assumption of male entitlement. He was never taught to regulate his emotions, especially anger. I also think
Some of my siblings and extended family on both sides are/were autistic.
My mother appears to me to be neurotypical, however, some of her siblings and extended family appear to me to be autistic. Many of the people in my extended family are very talented in the arts and sciences, even a few savants here and there. As far as I know, I am the only one who has been diagnosed.
What helps you prevent or cope with moments of overwhelm?
Generally, my spirituality helps me cope.
I mentally chant the mani prayer “Om Mani Padme Hum” constantly, like an earworm. This is from the Buddhist tradition. It translates to “Hail to the Jewel in the Lotus.” The jewel symbolizes the divine spark in all humans and living things. The lotus, a beautiful and fragrant flower that grows in the swamp with its roots in the muck, is a metaphor for the condition of the Divine as It exists on the material plane. The Dalai Lama has invited everyone, regardless of race or religion, to chant this prayer for universal enlightenment and compassion. Constantly chanting this prayer reminds me to be gentle with myself and everyone else, because
We are all jewels in the lotus, manifestations of God.
Even people who do bad things are not bad souls, they are like actors playing the part of the bad guy in theater. While I may despise their actions or even the character they are playing,
I don’t hate them any more than I hate Anthony Hopkins for playing Hannibal Lector.
He’s not really a bad guy, just playing one in the movies. The same goes for people who mistreat me: they are pure souls just like everyone else is, and just like I am. They’re simply going through a learning experience right now which requires them to act that way. Even TFG: though I recoil from his actions and the character he plays, I know it’s just a role and he is a pure soul just like we all are.
Other coping strategies I employ include wearing earplugs all the time and sometimes earmuff-style hearing protectors when out and about or when the neighbors are making too much noise. I also allow myself time to rest when I get back home from being out in public or anytime I’m stressed and overwhelmed.
What skills or strategies have helped you to work with your autistic mind?
When I want to work on something that requires focus, I block out several hours during a time I’m not likely to be disturbed. I need silence because any kind of sound distracts me, especially music or speech. If I get interrupted, I get upset, and I have a hard time getting back to what I was doing. So I arrange my life so as to minimize interruptions. I’m lucky to be able to do this.
What accessibility/support have you sought since learning you’re autistic? What support do you wish was easier to access?
I told my supervisors and coworkers that I am autistic. This way they don’t get mad at me for being different and they don’t expect me to be like everybody else.
When the people around me know that I’m autistic, I don’t have to mask as hard, and I have more energy to do more interesting things.
What support do you wish was easier to access?
I wish I could have on the job coaching for various problems as they arise. My previous supervisor has an autistic nephew, whom he mentors. I could talk with that supervisor about anything. Under him I held the same job for 8 years, far longer than I’d ever kept a job before. Now — not so much. This is another resource that is more likely to be available to people whose needs are more obvious and visible. It would be nice if it were available to anyone who needed it, no matter how “high functioning” we appear.
How have you self-advocated for your needs?
I’ve tried to self-advocate a few times but it’s tough because my needs are not as obvious as those with visible disabilities. So now I just do what I need to do.
It is easier to apologize than to ask permission.
How does your autistic identity impact your friendships?
I don’t have friends. I never have.
Every now and then there’s a person I associate with for a time, but they’re not really friends because I can’t be myself with them.
Often the person is very needy. Most of our time together I’m listening to them and doing things for them. They attach themselves to me because I give them what they need. Then eventually we drift apart because I don’t have the energy to continue the job anymore. I don’t try to contact them any more because I feel guilty.
How does your autistic identity impact your romantic relationships?
I have come to see that romantic relationships are entanglements that are usually more trouble than they are worth.
When I am in a relationship, I lose myself.
What is your experience with medical systems? Are there ways you feel they can be improved for autistic individuals?
I am happy that the medical system gave me a diagnosis and that I can get vaccines and other preventive care. I wish it didn’t cost so much money.
I wish medical professionals would listen and not interrupt. When someone interrupts me, I feel like I have to stop talking. People often misunderstand what I say and instead of asking for clarification, they go off on a tangent talking about what they think I said, and I can’t get a word in edgewise.
Autistic people are experts on our own lives and I wish professionals would respect this. Instead of reading outdated and ableist books written by neurotypicals, they should listen to our lived experiences
without judgment or presumption that they know us better than we know ourselves.
Your Past
How did being an undiagnosed autistic child impact your childhood?
My childhood was pretty rough.
My peers bullied me. My father — who was also likely autistic — tried to beat and shame the autism out of me. My mother sat on the sofa and prayed the Rosary while her husband was raging against her children. She was a good female, putting her man’s wants and needs first. My teachers stifled me, said I had to give the other kids a chance. They were also openly racist and sexist. This was long before Title 94–142 mandated adapted education for students with special needs. There were no gifted classes, no IEP’s or AP classes. I just had to stifle myself and work on passing for human.
During recess, I’d sit in the corner and watch the ants. Sometimes, kids would come over and bully me and I’d go up in the sky and wait for it to be over.
In second grade, I was offered an opportunity to go to a boarding school for gifted children but my parents declined. My mother said, “All those smart boys and you’re away from home, they could hurt you.” I now realize that she was talking about sexual harassment but at the time I thought she meant, my feelings would get hurt because I’m a girl so there’s no way I could be as smart as the boys.
I was an alternate on the Junior Quiz Bowl team even though I knew more answers than the rest of the team put together but they never let me play. The other kids on the team voted me to be the alternate because they were all friends with each other and they didn’t like me. I had to sit on the side and watch as we flopped big time. Our faculty advisor did nothing.
Back then, we were in the Space Race, and extraterrestrial humanoids were popular characters on TV and in novels, comics, movies, etc.
I identified with these ET characters and theorized that I was from another planet.
I was close to one of my sisters, so I told her that she was from another planet also, even though I knew she wasn’t. I don’t like to lie, but I did this so that she wouldn’t feel left out and I wouldn’t feel so alone. I even made a song about our imagined origin, similar to Superman’s backstory. I sang it in my head all the time and it helped me cope. I sang it for my sister also but it didn’t seem to affect her like it did me.
In what ways did you camouflage or mask?
I kept quiet and did my best to avoid being noticed. I still think of masking as ‘passing for human.”
How has your identification as autistic changed how you view your childhood or earlier periods of adulthood?
Now that I know that I am autistic, I understand why I did the things I did. I can forgive myself and others.
Talking to Others About Autism
How do you describe autism to people who are not familiar with it?
I describe autism as feeling like I come from another planet.
What do you wish others knew about autism?
We are not puzzles. We are not broken and don’t need to be cured. We are not Rain Man.
We have emotions. We have empathy.
We have specialized skills and insights that would be helpful to humanity if given a chance. We don’t like being treated like a piece of furniture. We’re aware of a lot more than people think we are. And we see neurotypical people even though they don’t see us.
To all neurotypicals, especially males,
please don’t tell us what our needs or feelings or motives are.
You’re not in our skins. We are.
Please don’t interrupt us when speaking or engrossed in something unless the interruption is for a genuine emergency.
When I’m working on something, don’t bother me to make your coffee or to tell you what time it is. The hard thing about being female is being born into a subservient role, honoring everyone else’s wants and needs before one’s own, and having an endocrine system that encourages that role. This can be an opportunity to learn, practice and teach compassion, which is the greatest of all virtues. That’s why Green Tara always incarnates as female. No one ever said it’s easy, though.
What is your advice for someone who thinks they might be autistic?
It gets better. Don’t compare yourself to others. Find your strengths and play to these.
Are there any fictional autistic characters that miss the mark on depicting autism?
Rain Man
One of my brothers always says I’m like Rain Man. I’m not like Rain Man at all. I can’t count things just by looking at them. I don’t have an eidetic memory. In the movie, they kept saying he was very “high functioning.” I don’t like functioning labels because they’re ableist, but it looked to me like his support needs were very high, not like a real-life level 1 “high-functioning” autistic. I drive about as well as he did, but I don’t delude myself that “I am an excellent driver.” I don’t watch TV, so I don’t get attached to certain programs as he did. I need my routines, but I don’t make my problems into other people’s problems. I need to wear cotton, but it doesn’t have to be from Kmart. Rain Man was based on Kim Peek, a real-life person who was not autistic. Although he was misdiagnosed as autistic earlier in life, it later turned out that he had a split-brain condition from birth.
Forrest Gump
Another character who gets it all wrong is Forrest Gump. He’s portrayed as a savant, but savants are proficient in one area from early childhood, while Forrest Gump is an instant expert at anything he tries. In addition, that film has some racist undertones. Forrest Gump is named after a founder of the KKK and is shown to excel in various areas that Black people are traditionally associated with. As if he, a mentally challenged white man, can outshine Black people in their traditional areas of expertise.
This is the racist “Mighty Whitey” trope
also seen in earlier works such as Shogun, Avatar, Dances with Wolves, etc. This trope is very harmful because some white people, especially some impressionable young white male people, take this trope to heart and try to re-enact it in real life, with often awful consequences to all involved.
But I digress. We were talking about portrayals of autistic people in media.
I understand there have been other portrayals of autistic characters on TV such as The Big Bang Theory and House. However, I quit watching TV in my early teens so I can’t comment on these.
Wednesday Addams
I’ve heard some people say that Wednesday Addams is coded autistic. I’ve seen a few clips from that series and I don’t think that character is autistic. She is cruel and sadistic but the real-life autistic people I’ve known are usually very kind and empathic. I would never put piranhas in a swimming pool, no matter what the kids in the pool did. I don’t make morbid wisecracks in order to sit back and enjoy others’ discomfort. I don’t like having ugly pictures in my head, so I don’t put ugly pictures into other people’s heads. And neither would/does any autistic person I know. I think it’s more likely that the character is coded with antisocial personality disorder.
Saying Wednesday Addams is coded autistic reinforces the stereotype that we are sociopaths who lack empathy. This puts us real-life autistic folks in a bad light.
Are you involved in any forms of autistic activism?
Most of my activity is on social media, where I answer questions, correct misconceptions, and share my experiences.
At present I am working on a series of message buttons to support Autism Appreciation.
Awareness is good, acceptance is better, appreciation is awesome!
If anyone would like any of these buttons please contact me thru the links below. More designs pending.
Connecting with You
If someone would like to connect with you, how can they reach you?
Email: jonipinkney@gmail.com
Facebook: facebook.com/joni.pinkney.1
Do you have any works, websites, or other creative ventures you would like to share with others?
Medium: justin-olhipi.medium.com/
Soundcloud: soundcloud.com/joni-peralta
Youtube: youtube.com/jonipstatsandallmath
Quora: quora.com/profile/Justin-Olhipi
Mani Prayer for Universal Compassion and Enlightenment: https://on.soundcloud.com/L6pBo
Thanks again for this opportunity to be seen and heard
— Justin Olhipi (Just an Old Hippy)
Thank you for reading. If you’d like to read more about autism, sign up for my FUNletter.
